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- I'm not a good networker.
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Hey royals,
Confession.
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I don't like small talk.
"How's your day?"
"What do you do?"
"So what brings you here?"
It feels... performative.
I don't have an emotional attachment to strangers. Their day doesn't matter to me. And pretending it does feels superficial.
Now, before you think I'm antisocial - I'm not.
I'm extroverted.
Put me in a room with the right people, and my energy goes up.
But put me in a room where I have to manufacture a connection? I switch off.
And for the longest time, I thought this meant I wasn't a good networker.
The event
I went to an event recently because Chloe was moderating.
It wasn't a speaking gig for me. She tried to help me get a slot, but it was too last-minute. So I just went for dinner.
Fun fact?
I didn't even collect my badge.
Technically... I was kind of gatecrashing.
Even though I was invited.
Very on-brand.
Instead of walking around shaking hands, Chloe and I scanned the room.
We saw Vinod, founder of MoneySmart, sitting at a table in his company's T-shirt.
Both of us like money.
That was enough signal.
We picked the MoneySmart table.
No roaming.
No random mingling.
No forced smiles.
Just alignment.
Strategic > random
Here's what I've realised as I've grown older:
Networking isn't about volume.
It's about resonance.
Building a connection takes energy.
And energy is a currency.
When you give it to the wrong people, it becomes tedious.
When you give it to aligned people, it compounds.
Strategic networking isn't collecting business cards.
It's about identifying like-minded signals and going deeper rather than wider.
That night, instead of 20 shallow conversations, we had a few meaningful ones.
And meaningful always wins.
The projector reality
In Human Design, I'm a Projector.
Projectors are told to "wait for the invitation".
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For years, I've noticed something interesting:
When I'm invited, people listen.
When I chase, the weight isn't the same.
So instead of chasing rooms, I build platforms.
Social media.
Stages.
Communities.
Because when you create a signal, invitations follow.
It's not that I can't capture attention.
It's that I refuse to force attention.
There's a difference.
The confidence part
Strategic networking requires confidence.
Not arrogance.
Confidence in:
Who you are.
What you stand for.
What rooms are worth your energy?
And what conversations you don't need to pretend to care about.
I don't need to care about how someone's day is going.
But I care deeply about:
Capital structures.
Automation systems.
Founder psychology.
Wealth building.
Freedom.
Lead with topics, not pleasantries.
That's my style.
Not everyone networks the same
Kelly is what I call a bond networker.
She can approach or be approached - and somehow still resonate.
That's her design.
Mine?
Strategic alignment.
As you grow older, your time becomes more accounted for.
Networking randomly is a luxury.
Strategic networking is maturity.
Business and personal
This applies to more than events.
In business, if your target audience is wrong, nothing converts.
In personal life, if your values don't align, nothing lasts.
It's the same principle.
Alignment creates flow.
Misalignment creates friction.
Freedom - of time, wealth, location, happiness - doesn't come from being everywhere.
It comes from being intentional.
If you hate networking...
Maybe you don't hate people.
Maybe you hate pretending.
Maybe you don't need to network more.
Maybe you need to network smarter.
Confidence. Clarity. Alignment.
Everything I build:
It all comes back to this: Options.
When you build options, you don't chase rooms.
You choose them.
And that, to me, is the highest form of strategic networking.
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